Archive for the ‘fuck you’ Category

In cuntygoodnessoftheday, fuck you, mah squishy, poop on December 3, 2009 at 11:06 pm

Douche Nozzle:

A douche nozzle for expanding the vaginal canal and contacting the walls of the canal with either a slightly acidic or basic solution before sperm injection and during ovulation for the purpose of increasing the likelihood of selectively conceiving either a female or male baby. A process for selectively conceiving a male or female baby by injecting the appropriate solution into the vaginal canal using the douche nozzle of this invention.

See also:

Yes you.


how bout a big, far, sloppy NO.

In FML, fuck you, i don't like breeders, kids on October 25, 2009 at 2:25 am

“no one will ever know love until they have a child” Or some shit like that. Really? Like, really really? Do you know me Mommy Breeder? I’m assuming you don’t, (which you don’t) since not only am I married (so therefore I must be loved to a certian degree) have a mother who sends me text messages on every Thursday night to say hello (which I’m sure Hitler didn’t do at any labor camp, he didn’t send them love notes) or have a dog wake you up at one am to be petted (that’s not love, that’s seperation anxiety)

But no. Since I’ve never had to deal with three am feedings ( my dog has a strict 3x daily diet) been shat on, and my vagina has not been sacrificed to some unforgiving god who demands a vaginal sacrifice, I have no idea what it’s like to be loved unconditionally.

I like kids. Hell, I work in a fucking toy store. But I don’t like being belittled for not having kids. I don’t want them. Neither does my husband. I like sex, money and a vagina that doesn’t yawn. I like my trendy babyless car and my disorganized babyless life.

You are a total stranger and you have no right to convince me that I want kids when I have never wanted them for all the reasons I have just stated. You are More than welcome to continue to bear children and raise your family as you see fit. I’m not going to convice you to give one up for adoption so your kid will have the same experince as I did growing up.

Why? Because that’s what respect is.
Have a nice day.

fuck tumblr.

In facebook, fuck you, myspace, social networking, tumblr, twitter on October 23, 2009 at 11:27 pm

I understand that part of what tumblr is is the fact that they have a more streamlined look to it i.e no comments or blog roll and shit like that. What I don’t understand is they offer the option to plug in some HTML for a commenting option, but you have to register with that hosts site. So, either 1) I’m too stupid to figure it out (which could be quite true) 2) they make configuring it so fucking complicated you have to be Jesus of HTML to figure it out, or 3) you simply have to register with them. Now they do have a facebook, twitter, myspace option, but that doesn’t cater to readers who wish to remain anonymous. Those commenters who like to leave nasty, rude and sometimes witty remarks on your page like a shitsmear on white undies. No, for them they can’t comment because they would negate the purpose of being ANONYMOUS. Fuck you tumblr.